And The Winner Is...

Who cares!

Music's version of the Academy Awards were handed out last night at the 50th Grammy Awards Ceremony and scrolling through the list of winners this morning, the same thought that strikes me every year slammed into the front of my brain.

All these shows are pointless. They don't reward the actual best of the past year; they hand out little statues to a combination of old standard winners and the odd complete upset. Only when there is absolutely no way to avoid giving the award to the logical and deserving choice, like the year OutKast won for Record of the Year, do we see the rightful winners walk up the steps to make an acceptance speech.

Yes, this is my Kanye Moment, in part because, as per usual, Kanye didn't get his moment last night.

The Record of the Year category has me a little torn, because on one hand, my man Mark Ronson produced Amy Winehouse's winning track "Rehab," but on the other, I really don't think it was Record of the Year. It was a great track, but how does anything besides Rihanna's ridiculously infectious, played every 47 seconds, Summer Jam of the last Seven Summers "Umbrella" take home this award?

Remember a few years back, right after Ray Charles passed, he won like 300 Grammy's? Yeah, they have a way of paying tribute to people once they've died or, as was the case this year, whenever someone puts together a tribute album to them.

Herbie Hancock's River: The Joni Letters, a tribute to Canadian folkie Joni Mitchell snagged Album of the Year. Can anyone between ages 16-35 name two Joni Mitchell songs? Did this album even chart this year? I know it's not about popularity and sales figures, but seriously. This album was better than The Foo Fighters latest disc, Winehouse's Back in Black and Kanye's Graduation? Please...

To prove I'm not a complete homer who only thinks his faves got robbed, there is no way on Earth that Man Crush #6 Justin Timberlake deserved to take home the award for Best Dance Recording. Is "LoveStoned/I Think That She Knows" a great record? Of course it is, but it doesn't hold a flame to any of the other actual dance recordings nominated in the category. "D.A.N.C.E." by Justice deserved this award easily.

Old standby Bruce Springsteen netted a handful of awards last night too, including Best Rock Song for "Radio Nowhere" in a category where he beat out "Icky Thump" by The White Stripes, "It's Not Over" by Daughtry and "The Pretender" by The Foos. I'm not saying Bruce doesn't deliver good music, but really, Best Rock Song? Is it even rock in the first place?

All in all, the song remains the same with the Grammy's. They have become utterly pointless to pay attention to and even less useful to watch, as the telecast consists of 287 performances by 281 artists you have never heard of and three trophies being handed out to undeserving recipients. Hopefully, the Oscars don't let me down come the end of the month.

Oh yeah, one more thing...

"Only playa that was robbed and kept all his jewelry"
Kanye West, "Diamonds From Sierra Leone" from the album Late Registration

It done happened again Kanye... it done happened again...