10 Things I Learned This Week

It's been a busy and annoying week this week, lemme tell ya. Actually, that's sort of what I do here each week isn't it?

1. "Dance movies are kind of like porn huh?"
That was Sarah's assertion following our Valentine's night at the movies watching Step Up 2: The Streets. "You know, they have plots and everything but it's really just an excuse for the dancing." You have to admit, the woman kind of has a point, no?

2. Revenge of the No Returning Stars Sequel
A few weeks back I opined about this phenomenon and Step Up 2 is proof on celluloid. Yes, Channing Tatum reprises his role as Tyler Gage, but it's only for ten minutes to give you a clue as to who the new lead is. One dance off, one character introduction and he's out. The rest is all newbies and a below average flick. All that being said, I am a dance movie guy, so I still liked it, but it could have been waaaaaaaaay better.

3. Speaking of Movies That Could Have Been Better...
Valentine's Day turned into a Double Feature as we took in Jumper apres Step Up 2 and a brief intermission. You know those movies that aren't bad and you enjoy them but as soon as the credits roll you're thinking about how they could have change two or three things and made an even better movie? That was Jumper. Hopefully they'll do a better job on Jumper 2, which I say will hit the big screen in, let's say March 2010.

4. Triumphant Return Update
In talking things over a little in the last couple days, it's looking like I might make a triumphant return to Ontario earlier than originally planned. The original ETA was May when Sarah was done her placement in cold-ass Labrador, but that would leave me flying solo here in St. John's and really, what the hell would I do that for? So I think I'll be jumping on a plane sometime in early April to land in London for the summer. Status: Updated.

5. Is It Tuesday Yet?
Sitting here all week knowing that I wasn't going to get the latest issue of Passion in my hands until this coming Tuesday at the earliest has been killing me. I really am an impatient bastard some times. I think it's having seen the Natasha Bedingfield cover and knowing that my article is mentioned on said cover that has me even more antsy than normal. The fact that I'm picking it up at Chapters might have something to do with it too... since Chapters = Starbucks.

6. No One Likes a Quitter
More importantly, I don't like quitters, so why would I honestly want to be one? With that in mind, I'm taken up smoking again and lemme tell you how much I love it. Why I cleaned my lungs of all those delicious carcinogens and sweet, sweet nicotine in the first place is beyond me. Plus, I'm actually a much less angry person when I'm smoking. I get that from my mom...

7. Position Players Haven't Even Reported Yet
And I have three fantasy teams lined up - at three different sites - and draft preparation has begun. Draft #1 is Thursday for the Public Yahoo League I plan on winning. Draft #2 is an MLB.com league with my friend Beast; I plan on winning that too. Draft #3 is the most important one though, as it's the ultra-competitive, bragging rights battle of the Bugs & Cranks Crew at CBS Sportsline. I update you as the season progresses.

8. Some People Really Are Stupid
Like the ones who come in to request another movie because they didn't like the one they rented and then get mad at you when you tell them that is not possible. Seriously, this happens.

Customer: Hi, could I get another movie? This one is just really no good.

Spencer: Sorry, uh, we can't really do that. I mean, we'd be broke by next Tuesday if we did that.

Customer: Oh, no, I understand it's just that this one is really bad. I mean, we had to turn it off it was so bad.

Spencer: Oh I get it. It's Mr. Bean's Holiday. Of course it's bad. 30% of the movies we have in this store are awful. Have you seen Ice Spiders? Still, that doesn't mean we're going to give you a free movie because you have crappy taste.*

* Of course, I don't say this... I just think it and continue to be as diplomatic as possible until the customer invariably tells me I'm an asshole and that they're never renting from our store again.

9. Morons = Inspiration
As I've said before, it really is amazing where one draws their inspiration from. I draw mine from the common sense challenged customers of the world. Inspiration for what you ask? One of those illusions I harbour in my over-sized head...

10. Sarah Really, Really Wants a Dog
You know your girlfriend really wants a dog when she sits up at 11:00 at night watching the Westminster Dog and Kennel Show until you come home just so she can see all the cute little dogs. At least she's on board with naming the thing Balls whenever we get one...