Monday, February 18, 2008

27 Years of Useless

I can't believe I forgot about this in 10 Things yesterday...

On February 17, 1981, Paris Whitney Hilton was welcomed into the world by parents Rick and Kathy Hilton.

On February 18, 1981, she started to become famous for doing absolutely nothing.

Actually, that isn't true. Paris is famous for a lot of things:

  • One Night in Paris
  • The Simple Life
  • Really Bad Acting
  • Even Worse Albums
  • Trying to trademark the phrase "That's Hot"
  • Showing off her vagina to anyone standing around while she exits a car
  • Horrible Driving
  • Once being engaged to a guy named Paris
  • Popularizing carrying around little dogs as accessories

She's the former BFF of such noteworthy pseudo-talents as fellow crotch shot enthusiasts Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan, as well as Simple Life co-star Nicole Richie and fellow "famous for absolutely nothing" Reality TV star Kim Kardashian.

Her list of former flames include male models (Jason Shaw), Avril's husband (Deryck Whibly of Sum 41), a Backstreet Boy (Nick Carter), The Sleaziest Man on Earth (Rick Soloman) and the Greek male version of herself (Stavros Niarchos).

Oh yeah, she is also the inspiration for Perez Hilton of course, which I sure as hell couldn't live without...

Happy Birthday Paris... here's to another year of doing absolutely nothing useful!

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