Wednesday, December 19, 2007

The Rundown: Travel Insanity


I can't begin to tell you how awful the last couple of days have been. Actually, yes I can, as this is my blog and I can tell you whatever the hell I want.

Anyway, the short version is this - we were driving to Cambridge on Monday night and a deer jumped in front of the car. Nine seconds later, the deer and the car were fucked, Sarah and I were covered in glass and our hearts were racing. After a couple days of sitting around Cambridge sorting things out, we booked a flight tonight to get us home on Christmas Eve.

All that being said, since we're due for a rundown, let's get it under way, shall we?

Five Worst Moments of This Trip

5. Missing Tania & Tim's Wedding
Remember, this was originally supposed to be a trip to the Dominican for the wedding of two of Sarah's close friends that got kiboshed by school obligations at the start of January. Maybe we should have just cut our loses here...

4. Vancouver Appendectomy
After we adjusted from the DR plans, we were set to go to VanCity to visit Sarah's Mom, Brother and the aforementioned Tania and Tim, as well as squire me around her stomping grounds. Two days prior to takeoff, Sarah's appendix decided it needed to be removed and once again, a trip was over.

3. 4 AM Shovelling
We finally had a flight plan that wasn't ruined by surgery and heading to bed we read of an incoming snow storm, but figured we'd be fine. Sarah, a notorious pre-flight insomniac, woke at 4 AM to see what she called 6" of snow outside and told me I should go out and shovel. Turns out, Sarah really doesn't know what 6" looks like (insert joke here) as there was two feet of snow for me to shovel a path through. Better yet, the cabbie pulled into the uncleared neighbour's driveway and asked me why I hadn't shovelled.

2. Figuring Out How To Get Home
Lemme tell you - this part has seriously sucked balls. There aren't many options for flights at Christmas time and getting to Newfoundland is even harder than that. Everyone - Garry, Aunt Maxine, The Eugenius, EVERYONE - has been involved in sorting us out. I've stayed quiet; they can sort it out and tell me where to go. Take that however you may.

1. The Deer
I know this part is obvious, but hey, it's one of the worst experiences of my life period, yet alone this trip. Thankfully, Sarah and I are both safe and without injury and we're now able to laugh at the absolute ridiculousness that is this trip. But wait, there's more...

We owned that car for exactly 11 hours when we ran into Bambi's friend. We signed for it at 11 AM in London and at 10 PM on Highway 8, WHAMMO!

It's not like we were in uncharted territory: I grew up twenty minutes from the accident, have friends that live right down the road and have been through there more times than I can remember without even seeing a deer.

From the time of the accident until we set foot in my mom's apartment was three hours. It too two hours for the OPP and a tow truck to arrive. What happens if we are randoms to the area and don't have my mom's warm car to sit and smoke darts in?

So now I gotta sign off - I'm tired, I'm a little hung over after powering back 50 oz. of beer at dinner and I'm sick of thinking about this stupid trip. Goddamn deer!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

During my one drive through Ontario all I ever saw were a few moose (and that was in June). I didn't realize deer could even survive in such harsh arctic conditions. You sure it wasn't a reindeer?

(Translation from Asshole American: I'm really glad you're both OK. It sounds insane.)