Making another appearance here on iBlog is the always popular Dishonour Roll, a segment dedicated to the stupid people and ridiculous events that enter my world.
Stepping up to the plate today are the fine folks at Montana's Cookhouse and their conviction that I must undergo Bar Training.
As I told you a couple weeks back, I'm back pulling on the taps and popping caps off bottles on a semi-regular basis. At the same time that they hired me, two other people were also given an opportunity to work behind the bar, neither of whom have any experience.
My appointment to the role of bartender was someone out of necessity - a dude got himself fired and they needed someone with experience ASAP to cover the shifts he would no longer be working.
Cue me and two days later, I'm opening the bar solo.
No big deal - been there, done that, got the t-shirt. A week later, I was closing the bar on a Sunday night. Again, no problemo.
In the meantime, the other two hires have been pulling 3 hour shifts training behind the bar for the last two weeks or so, getting used to the pace, learning how to do counts, figuring what makes a Long Island Iced Tea and all that.
So here I am yesterday, chilling on my day off when the phone rings at 6:45.
The bar is getting swamped and they want me to come in and help out.
After a brief internal struggle over my willingness to go in, I showed up at work, smashed through an hour on the bar and was ready to go when the bartender who was on asked me, "Aren't you staying to train on close tonight?"
I says pardon?
In the least arrogant way possible, I explained that training on the bar isn't something that I am in serious need of, what with having run a fine establishment on my own for a time up in Midland and having been behind a bar a time or two. The newbies I understand, but me? No thanks.
Unfortunately, this might be something I can't escape.
See, the managers aren't going to want to be put in a position where the other two hires can complain about having to go through training while I just waltz back behind the bar and start making cash - training shifts mean no tips.
They also won't want to put themselves in a spot where I can screw up and then use the "Well I didn't get any training" cop out, which I would never think of doing to be totally honest.
So, I can understand the need to make me work a couple of craptacular 3 hour tours of duty behind the bar under the watchful eyes of K. Reid or CB (our two senior bartenders), but here is the rub:
How you gonna make me do these stupid training shifts after I'm closing the bar next Saturday and Sunday night?
I'm scratching your back and covering for when you gave two bartenders the same entire weekend off. Now you scratch mine and get rid of the unnecessary training.
Pouring beer is pouring beer, I'm a clean freak when it comes to the areas I work and I know how to count. What else is there to know? At least there is no eLearning to go along with it...