Missing: My Wedding Ring (Updated)

Sadly, there is no reward because I'm broke and unemployed, but the positive is that if it's found, you'll still get to enjoy my witty banter here on iBlog.

If not, there is a distinct possibility that Sarah kills me.

I knew I should have followed my man Ty's lead and put it on a necklace that I never take off. Although, I don't wear a necklace and if I did, I'd probably take it off every day and still end up losing the damn ring...

Took it off to do the dishes last night - I'm domestic like that - and haven't seen it since. Could have sworn I put it in my back pocket before I plunged my hands into the soapy depths of the sink, but apparently not as my ring is nowhere to be found.

Time to turn this place upside down and see if we can't avert disaster - or at least postpone it until Sarah gets around to reading this post later tonight... damn supportive wife having iBlog as her homepage!

Check back later for updates... and wish me luck.

Update - 8:48 a.m.

After an exhaustive twelve-minute search, the crisis was averted.

In addition to discovering my ring in the cushions of the couch, I also found three pretzels, two Skittles and an questionable peanut that I fed to the dog.

Nothing like getting the old heart rate pumping to start the day!

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Gerard Butler Gave My Wife a Nickname

Nicknames are a key component of being a member of The Kyte Family.

Everyone has one, sometimes regardless of whether they like it or know it. Some people, myself included, have multiple nicknames. You can't just be the name on your driver's license; that's just too boring.

Additionally, you can't just pick something and attempt to run with it. A nickname must be bestowed upon you for it to work. My mom and I are shining examples of that.

My mother, Carol, hasn't been called Carol by either me or Pete in years. We call her Faye, as do a lot of people, thanks to us.

Way back when, Pete and I watched this movie, A Night in the Life of Jimmy Reardon, and the father was this abrasive alcohol who screamed about something every time he came home from drinking. The target of his tirades?

His wife ... Faye.

Twenty years later, she's still Faye, and a few other things.

Me? I'm Sherman.

Have been since Grade 11 or so, thanks to a horse racing friend named Keith Oliver and the last reasonably entertaining Eddie Murphy movie, The Nutty Professor.

For those who don't remember, the lead character's name is Sherman Klump, a rotund scientist with a fondness for food. Keith, whose nickname is Redman, saw said film and thought I bore a strong resemblance to the Eddie Murphy's character.

The exact quote was "Every time I see you, you just keep getting fatter and fatter. (Laughs) You're like that fuckin' Nutty Professor! (Laughs) What are you doin' Sherman?" Laughter filled the shed row, the comedy was explained to Pete and a nickname was born.

In fact, my friend Cornflake's mom - whose nickname is Ma Bell - used to introduce me to people as "Pete's brother Sherman," thinking it was my actual given name.

Which brings us to Gerard Butler and my beautiful wife.

For the nearly three years we've been together, we've been trying to come up with a nickname for Sarah. We being me and Faye. She's tried to force a couple lousy ideas on her, but nothing has stuck.

Last night, Sarah and I settled in to watch P.S. I Love You, laughing through the opening scene that is actually quite reminiscent of some of the moronic arguments and fights that we have.

She's the worrying, panicked, "What if it all doesn't work out?" type and I'm, according to the movie, "the care-free Irish guy who sings all the time."

At the climax of the fight, Gerard Butler storms out of the house, frustrated with his wife's ridiculous worries and word-twisting, angrily exclaiming, "Crazy bitch pain in me hole" on his way out the door.

And thus, a nickname was born.

Now, I can't rightfully use that in public to get my wife's attention; parents will be offended if their children are in range and females everywhere will slap me before hearing the explanation. At that point, it's too late anyway.

But PIHM works real well.

Full name, C.B. Pihm, as in Crazy Bitch Pain In Me Hole, but shortening it to just Pihm works well enough for me.

I love you Sarah, even if sometimes Sarah goes away and C.B. Pihm takes her place ...

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Way Too Similar

It really is scary just how similar my brother and I are. He's the one on the left if you're wondering.

Beyond looking like twins for our entire adolescence and all the shared traits and mannerisms, it turns out we're eerily similar in terms of a number of other things as well.

We've both taken very odd paths to find the careers we want and the work that makes us most happy. Pete was on his way to stardom and success as a horse racing analyst and host before leaving it all behind to get more hands-on with the ponies. Now, he's found a great mix, working as an agent (he buys and sells horses for people) and being back behind the mic at Fort Erie and Tioga Downs.

If you've been here more than a minute, you know my story, so no need to say more than after years of trying to figure out what I wanted to do, I stumbled upon writing, fell in love with it and now you're reading the 509th post in iBlog history.

The most interesting - and also frustrating - similarity between mon frere et moi has to do with marriage and children.

I had everything planned out to propose to Sarah. We were having a weekend getaway at a beautiful hotel and I was going to do the "propose over dinner" like so many men before me. About three weeks before we went on our little trip, Pete popped the question. Not wanting to step on his toes, I pushed things back a month.

Then, whilst in the middle of getting everything coordinated and finalized for our beautiful destination wedding (and while in the process of moving here to Kimberley), an impromptu wedding announcement hit my Inbox. Pete and Brooke were making it official in Vegas at the start of November.

Now, Faye (our mom) calls me this morning to catch up. In the course of the discussion, she tells me that Pete and Brooke have selected a name for their daughter who will be entering the world some time in late September.

They're going to name her Charlie Olivia. Immediately, I started swearing.

Take a guess at what Sarah and I have always discussed and planned on naming our daughter, should we have one?

Yep... Charlie.

Technically, we were going to name her Charlotte and call her Charlie, but it's the same damn thing and now the version of me that is two years older and still not shaving on a regular basis has gone and Bogart'ed our name. Grrrrrr!

What's next?

Is he going to shave a mohawk into his head and start writing about MMA?

Maybe develop a fondness for tattoos and get some ink?

How's about moving to British Columbia?

Seriously, it's incredible how much alike the two of us are. Maybe that's why we fight like cats and dogs just about every time we see each other.

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If My Math is Correct, We're At ...

This is why I didn't post 10 Things yesterday. Well, this and general laziness that had me more interested in laying on the couch with my dog.

500 posts...

Honestly, if you told me when I started this thing that I would keep churning it out and get to 500 posts, I wouldn't have believed you. There was a point a few months back where I was writing here once or twice a week and now it's an almost everyday thing again and we're at #500.

To the 37 of you who religiously read iBlog - Thank You.

Most people would take their ball and go home if they were averaging 37 views a day for almost two years, but that 37 of you take the time each day to read my yammerings makes me sit back in this chair and write each day. That and I like laughing at my own jokes and ridiculousness.

As a special 500th Post treat, I'm going to let you in on a little something. It's called E. Spencer Kyte, Freelance Writer and can be found at http://espencerkyte.com.

My man Newt has been working on it for me for a while and though it isn't complete, I'm really proud of the way it looks and knowing that in the near future (hopefully), I'll be able to rollout a one-stop shop for all things me.

The plan is to house both the blogs there (how's that coming BTW, Newt?) and have updates of where I'm writing and what's going on in one location, so you don't have to go to each site, then check the Facebook Fan Page and so on and so on to know what's going on.

As always, I love feedback. Lemme know what you think of the site so far...

And thanks again for reading iBlog... all 37 of you!

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10 Things I Learned This Week

1. I'm Good at What I Do
For the last couple months, I've heard a lot of whining at work about not making any money and tips being horrible. In fact, I heard it through most of the winter too. Funny, I seem to make pretty decent cash every time I put on the apron and offer up food and drink. Then again, I'm also visible to my tables and willing to treat them like human beings, as opposed to inconvenient sacks of flesh that force me to earn my wages.

2. Misguided Attention
Somehow, I've spent a lot of time flicking through the channels this week and one thing I've really come to realize is that our media spends an awful lot of time talking about complete and utter bullshit. Headline News dedicates at least 12 hours a day to scandals and murder trials, analyzing it from every possible angle, while TLC is no longer about Learning whatsoever. It's about "Reality" or the fake version of it that works on television. No wonder I've spent so much time on the computer this week - there is nothing good to watch.



3. The Dog's Name is Chase
Yesterday's reports of rescuing a dog named Jake were incorrect; it turns out his name is Chase. That's the only part of the story that wasn't on point though, as talking with the woman yesterday revealed that she was "certain I closed that back door" before heading off to work. Wanna know how to be sure? Lock the damn thing. Easy.

4. Three Wins Away from Fulfilling My Prophecy
After a win in Game 1 yesterday, my Detroit Red Wings are three wins away from once again hoisting the Stanley Cup. Accept it now people: this is going to happen. What they will also do is fulfill my prediction from a few years back that the Wings would win two Cups before the Leafs won one. I didn't say it was rocket science or anything, but I thought it would take longer than three years to prove me right.

5. Pessimists Suck
Understand that I am an insane optimist - things are always going to work out even when there isn't an apparent solution, good things are going to happen and all that jazz. That being said, it still amazes me how negative some people can be about their work and their passions. I know writing is a tough road to travel, but telling that in excruciating detail is not necessary. Thanks for raining on my parade. Luckily, I carry an umbrella, just in case.

6. Somebody Has to be that One in a Million
I know I'm an optimist and making it in this business is a long shot, but doesn't someone have to be that one in a million? Three months ago, no one knew who Susan Boyle was. Now, she has a record deal and is known around the world. The Shack started as a personal project with 20 printed copies for friends and family. Now it's sold more than 2 million copies. You can't win if you don't buy a ticket and just because you don't want to buy tickets anymore doesn't mean I shouldn't start.

7. The Deer Aren't So Bad
Since moving here, people have warned us that the deer are nuts and will actually charge at you instead of running away from you like most woodland creatures will do. On numerous occasions this week, those people have been proven wrong. The pug and I run into at least two deer a day on our walks and by keeping calm and walking slowly, the deer bound down the hill in the opposite direction without any fuss.

8. The Shameless Self-Promotion Tour is Working
Readership is up everywhere. The fan base is growing daily and all the hours I put in networking away on Facebook and Twitter and everywhere else have paid off with my first official MMA interview with light heavyweight prospect Cody "Donnybrook" Donovan.

9. Tiananmen Square Was 20 Years Ago
You know how there are those pictures that will always be burned in your memory? The Tank Man from China's Tiananmen Square Protests in 1989 is one of those images for me. How was that possibly 20 years ago already? Where has the time gone?

10. Patiently Waiting, Though the Patience is Waning
If we're doing this, let's do this, but if we can't, just tell me so that I can find someone who can. Big things are coming and I want to be ready.

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All Me To Reintroduce Myself...

If it can work for Jay-Z, it can work for me!

After having spent the last number of months working on other people's projects and not putting myself out there as much as I could, today marks the rebirth of E. Spencer Kyte, shameless self-promoter.

Since there is no one else who is going to promote my work with more insight, passion and drive than I can myself, why wouldn't I get down to business?

I'm Twitter'ing, a new and improved Facebook Fan Page is in the works and you'll be seeing my stuff pop up anywhere and everywhere I can get it, especially the stuff from over at Keyboard Kimura.

C'mon - you had to know I wasn't going to get through a post about self-promotion without mentioning the new site...

Welcome to the re-launch of E. Spencer Kyte.

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For Buster...

No Rundown today. This one is real personal, so if you're not into that, come back tomorrow.

I'm asking for your strength and your prayers.

My grandpa and namesake - Edgar Gordon Levy - is in the hospital right now. He went in a couple days ago and while one concern has been dealt with, there are still a handful of unanswered questions to go along with the knowledge that at age 90, being in the hospital is never a good thing.

Buster is the only grandfather I have ever known; my dad's dad died when the old man was six, but somehow, Buster more than made up for the lack of a paternal grandfather. He was the best. Hell, he still is the best.

A gifted and talented artist, I know my passion for prose comes through him, as page upon page of handwritten notes and letters used to arrive at the house about once every two weeks. Some of his paintings still hang in Faye's apartment and I hope to one day scam one from her to have in our place.

Around Cornwall, he is the master of the St. Lawrence - the guy you need to talk to when you're heading out onto the water in search of perch, bass, pike or anything in between. Buster has the spots, the status report and the best homemade minnow traps every produced. Besides, a bad day on the water is better than a good day anywhere else...

Except at the track!

That love of horse racing that courses through the veins of Pete and I may come from Faye and Phil, but Faye sure as shit got it from her old man. For the last I don't know how many years, he's stashed away his allowance every week to build "The Bankroll," a pocket full of potential to wager at the wickets on longshots, sure things and hot tips at the track. Whether it be the old days of crossing the bridge to Massina, New York or hitting one of the shady spots that ran OTB in Cornwall itself, if we were in town, we made a trip to the track.

My mind is going to be preoccupied a little until I know what's going to happen with my grandpa, so I apologize in advance if I miss giving you your fix over the next couple of days...

I'm talking to you here Newt! Just kidding...

I'll be here and I will keep you posted.

When I talked to him last week he told me how proud he was that I had found something I was passionate about, so I can't stop, not for nothing.

That's the way he would want it.

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An Engaging Story

We're gettin' hitched!

Saturday night I asked Sarah to marry me and for some reason she actually agreed.

I'll pass along your congratulations - we're both really appreciative of all the support and excitement from the last couple days.

So I know what you're thinking: How'd you do it?

I'm glad you asked.

It starts a year and a half ago - October 2006 - when Sarah came home from Newfoundland for my cousin Rob's wedding. I went to pick her up and had made a sign one night at work that read "Welcome Home Baby!" and held it up like a sappy doofus when she came through the doors at Pearson.

Since then, every time I have had to pick her up at the airport - which hasn't been many, but still - I've brought that sign. Saturday was no different, except...

On the flip side of the cardboard was a brand new sign that simply read, "Sarah - Marry Me! - I Love You," along with a ring, of course.

She walked out of the baggage claim, noticed me, noticed the original sign and gave me a hug. Do you see it anywhere in there that she noticed the new sign? Nope.

I had to draw her attention to it post-hug.

"Look at the sign bub," I said, shaking and holding the ring in front of it.

Look.
Read.
Comprehend.
Astonishment.
Biggest Smile Ever.

Then she kind of just looked at the ring for a minute, smiling uncontrollably and shaking a little, all of which was the anticipated and welcomed reaction, not that I had any worries.

And with that, me and Ms. Cole were engaged.

* * * * * * * * * *

Answers to Frequently Asked Questions

1) Do we have a date in mind?
Yes - end of April, early May next year.

2) Where?
We're thinking destination, having found a beautiful resort in the Dominican that we both really like, but nothing is certain... yet. If 1/3 of the guests have to travel (think plane, not car) regardless of where we have it, why don't we all go some place?

3) Is she crazy, marrying me, the starving artist / part-time waiter?
I think so, but it was her decision...

4) Could I be any happier?
Nope, not in a million years!

I'll keep you posted on all things weddingy as they come up...

* * * * * * * * * *

One last thing:

I asked both her parents before proposing.

Guys - trust me on this one - this is a must. Do things the right way. Thank me for it later.

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Soundtrack of My Life

Song: Snow ((Hey Oh))
Artist: Red Hot Chili Peppers
Album: Stadium Arcadium (2006)

I didn't like the Red Hot Chili Peppers off the bat.

When everyone was fawning over Blood Sugar Sex Magik and "Under The Bridge," I thought both were just okay. They kind of annoyed me to be honest. They were more a spectacle than anything else, keeping people wondering what silly little thing they would do next.

Next was John Frusciante leaving mid-tour while in Japan to become a full-fledged addict.

Next was replacing the prodigious Frusciante with Dave Navarro, a move that nearly ended the Chili Peppers existence altogether.

Miraculously, Frusciante didn't die during his prolonged love affair with drug addiction and when he proved to be committed to living a clean and sober life, the decision was made to bring him back into the fold.

The result was Californication. That is when I got on board.

This song is the embodiment of everything I have now come to love about the post-Navarro Chili Peppers. Melodic, layered guitars, Frusciante's harmonizing with Anthony Kiedis, Flea's distinctive basslines and Chad Smith rattling on the drum kit in fits-and-starts.

[This song is] about the repeated failure to start your life anew and how difficult it can be to get rid of old ways of thinking, and destructive ideas we become so attached to.
- Anthony Kiedis

And there is the other part that makes this a favourite of mine.

While the quote works in reference to the Chili Peppers themselves - the band continued to abuse drugs and alcohol following the death of original guitarist Hillel Slovak in 1988 and watched Frusciante leave to become a professional addict - that message resonates with me on a personal note as well.

Over and over and over following my parents divorce I told myself that I would never grow up to be like my old man, only to see myself constantly repeating his mistakes. I too cheated on loved ones, squandered every penny I had and didn't know when to stop heading to the bar. At one point, I had nearly pissed everything completely away.

Saying you want to be better and actually taking the necessary steps towards doing so are two totally different things and it took me a long time to start making those steps. But I eventually righted the ship and found a better course.

Just like the Anthony, Flea, Chad and John.

I got your hey oh...

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The Rundown: I've Had A Bad Day or Two

Starting with this post, I'm getting my ducks in a row and hammering out as much writing and work from this computer as possible on a daily basis, because this is what makes me happy (aside from Sarah, puppies, babies, great movies, better books and sushi) and I'm sick of being miserable.

That being said, we're doing some cleansing today.

Warning: I'm getting real serious and personal here, so if that's not your bag... vamoose!

Five Worst Days of My Life

5. Kicked Out of University - May 1999
You think telling your parents you failed a course is hard? Try telling them the school they're paying good money to send you to has kicked you out entirely. Fuck me did this day suck. I managed to drink and party my way to a low enough average that the school didn't even want my money... and then I had to fess up to it to the 'rents. The old man told me I should just get a job in one of the Hamilton steel factories because that was all I would amount to anyway. Faye told me to stay home, go to Mac and get coddled. I moved back to Waterloo in September, worked for four months then rattled off sixteen straight months of school with a 71% average to graduate in June 2001.

4. Grandma Kyte's Funeral - November 2005
Bad for so many reasons, first of which is having to say goodbye to someone who was very, very important to me. My Grandma was crazy - she drank, she smoked non-filtered cigarettes by the truckload, she cursed more than I do. She was the best and I loved her dearly. This day gets extra awkward points for being a Kyte Family Function, meaning the extendeds whom I hadn't seen or spoken to in some time. Oh right, there was also some real nice Phil Time too.

3. The Night Before My Uncle Jack's Funeral - January 2004
That night, I decided to have a sit down with the old man after around a year of not speaking with him, wanting to get everything settled and start building something new. My cousins were never going to be able to speak to their father again and I didn't talk to mine by choice and that was ridiculous to me. So I tried... and failed... miserably. When conversations end with the one person (my old man) hollering at the top of his lungs (in public too) for the other person (me) to "Go Fuck Yourself," it's not really a very good evening. I've said seven words to him since.

2. Two Sunday's Ago - March 9, 2008
My brother ended a conversation with me in the same manner as my old man did, telling me to "Go Fuck Myself" and the worst part of all? He sounded just like the old man always did - He's right, you're wrong and if you can't see that, why bother with you? I got one brother and I don't want to lose him the way I have lost my old man...

1. Divorce Announcement - November 1999
See, I contend that it sucks more at age 21 than it does at age 6, because at 21, you know what all the problems they're talking about are. When you're younger, you can't comprehend these things and eventually it just becomes the way things have "always" been. Learning there was a whole lot of lying going on throughout your formative years really sucks balls. At least, to me it does.

* * * * * * * * * *
"Do it now 'cause tomorrow ain't promised today"
- Christopher Brian Bridges... Stand Up!

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This Is The Last Time I'll Mention The Facebook Fan Club

You have my word.

I have to stop. It's too damn depressing.

I'm no Mathlete, but even I know that 10 fans out of 458 "friends" isn't a very good batting average.

Thanks to the ten of you who have signed up. Even though you don't ever post anything on the page, it means a lot to me to know that you took the 1.3 seconds it takes to click Become a Fan.

D'you know what really sucks about it? Some of the people who aren't on board as of yet. You know, like my mother. Or my brother. Or any member of my family for that matter. Not even one member of my extended family has joined.

My old university roommate Amy, she's a fan of Kevin Smith, but not me.

My mate Tony from work - Danny Williams supporter. Spencer Kyte supporter, not so much. Though his wife is...

************

Yes. I really am this much of an insecure little girl.

Even though I know over 1000 people have stopped by this blog in a little over three months, I still have this weird need to know that people actually like what I do.

Intrinsic satisfaction be damned... I want my Sally Field moment where I can shout "You like me! You really like me!" and know that more than ten people are saying yes.

************

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My Exercise in Narcissism

You know what's fun? Building a self-referential Facebook profile of yourself...

That's how I've spent the better part of my morning, creating the E.Spencer Kyte Facebook page, where for the low low price of nothing, you too can click a button and become a fan of little, old me.

All joking aside, this is something I have been thinking of doing since my colleague from Bugs & Cranks AJ hooked up a B&C Page on The 'book. It's just a spot where you can collect updates on what's going on, like, say, I dunno, the relaunch of Passion Magazine tomorrow featuring none other than me! Sorry, I'm a little excited.

I decided to go with a Facebook site over MySpace for a couple reasons:

1. I'm always on Facebook anyway and I have a lot more friends there than on MySpace
2. MySpace seems to send me a lot of porn / "Hi, Spencer, I saw your profile" crap
3. I really do think that Facebook has the staying power necessary to become an outstanding networking and social interaction medium

Plus, once I accumulate clippings and pictures and whatnot, it gives me somewhere easy to post everything, I can run a link to the four sites from the page and if you have any incriminating pictures of me, you now have somewhere to put them for everyone to see. I know someone out there from the St. Jerome's days has a picture of me dressed as Britney Spears...

Anyhoo - drop by the new page, keep checking in here and if you ask me about the Britney Spears thing, I'll tell you...

OUT / ONE

P.S. If you can tell me who the picture is of and why it's here, you win a prize... I don't know what it is yet, but I'll think of something.

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Calling All Readers!

I'm wondering how many people actually stop by and read this bad boy and what and where my demographic hails from. There are a handful of people that I know for sure - Sarah, a couple of the Bugs, the ladies from Blockbuster - and I've already expressed my appreciation accordingly to them. But is that it?

I sure hope not, because it would really suck if I was only pulling seven readers, all of whom feel somewhat obligated to read my ramblings because they know/work/live with me. So here is what I am proposing:

Drop me a little "Hello" in the comments, so I can know a little more about you. Nothing major - who you are, where you're from, how you got here and let's say, your favourite musician. Don't know, something about this idea just makes me feel a little more connected with the people who are taking time out of their day to read what I think and I want to get to know each of you a little bit more. Except Chalk... I know enough about you!

Plus - I'm getting tired of getting messages on my Facebook Wall telling me how much you like / disagree / can't stand my blog while the "Comments Section" always reads ZERO.

Let's do something about that people and I'll get to know you a little more in the process.

OUT
N
E

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My Rolling Stone Interview

Before the seven of you reading this get super excited for your favourite blogger, understand that the good people at Rolling Stone haven't come knocking, nor have I secured Jann S. Wenner to sit down and answer some of my mundane questions.

Today's installment comes as a result of my purchasing the 40th Anniversary issue of Rolling Stone. The whole thing - at least the meat of it - is a collection of interviews with "important people" like Bill Clinton, Al Gore, Dave Matthews, Tom Hanks and a handful of others with different writers asking questions about what the future holds on various fronts, including politics, technology, music and what the most pressing issues are for the coming generations. And this inspired me to conduct my own version of the interview.

Questions by Rolling Stone. Answers by E. Spencer Kyte. Enjoy.

In general, are you optimistic or pessimistic about the future?
Neither, I'm realistic. Things aren't going to change overnight and that means that the immediate future will most likely be a lot like the present and the present kind of sucks. I mean, sure there are scattered positives, but on a whole, on a global scale, the world sucks. Our troops are in a war that we really should have nothing to do with, no one seems to be willing to do anything about real crises like Darfur and there is this little thing about the environment that has Al Gore all up in arms. And best of all, our politicians would much rather just tell you all the stuff the other guy didn't do than actually do something positive themselves.

On the topic of religion, do you see people getting more or less rational in the coming years?
Hopefully more rational, but I know religion is a very divisive topic so that is just optimism. To me, organized religion is a sham and I don't say that to disrespect anyone. But for me, it simply becomes another reason people fight, which is unnecessary. There are much bigger issues to take than someone believing in a different god than you. And then there is the whole "God's Law" side of the debate where people do things and refuse to do things in the name of God instead of acting and living like rational human beings.

Has your career unfolded the way you expected?
I'm just getting started and so far, I'm pleased. I was just saying earlier today that I look forward to being able to tell my children that anything is possible and be a real-life example of that for them. I only decided to do this (writing) a couple years ago and in the last year I have signed on with two sports websites, am a regular contributor to an outstanding magazine and have started this bad boy right here. Plus, I have a couple other projects in the works that have me more excited than anything else.

How could Canada make an difference in Darfur?
Right now, any form of action would be a starting point. Too much time is spent debating the issues and talking about finding a solution and putting an end to the atrocities and that goes for me too. It's easy for me to say, "I'm appalled by the situation in Darfur" and then do nothing about it. From my position, one of the foremost things I can do is present the issue and talk about it, as well as seek action in government. As for Canada, maybe they would like to think about where our troops are allocated. I mean, an entire culture of people are being eradicated in Darfur, yet we're in Iraq trying to bring democracy to a country that obviously doesn't want it.

Do you believe free speech is truly in danger?
100% I do and that really sucks for someone like me. I think there are still outlets where free speech is encouraged and welcomed, but as the global community become more and more of a multinational corporation and media outlets continue to dictate what you see and hear, those avenues will eventually be shut down or muted as best as they can be. It's not as bad here in Canada as it is in the US - yet - and the yet is what scares me.

Are there public figures who you think are inspiring as we move into the future?
Barack Obama gives me hope. I honestly wish he was a Canadian citizen or decided to become one so we could have someone like him leading our country. He is so different from the current regime on so many levels that, whether he wins the Democratic Nomination or not, knowing he will be a very visible and involved government figure makes me very pleased. Besides him, I'm waiting for the next great Canadian to step up in that role. We haven't had anyone who inspired us since Trudeau and that was before my time. Since I can remember we've had Mulroney, Kim Campbell briefly, Jean Chretien, Paul Martin and now Stephen Harper. Someone has to step to the forefront and be willing to be that person that champions Canada as the incredible nation that it is and unites our country, instead of dividing it. Not that everyone will agree on everything, but right now, all we keep electing are minority governments, which means everyone is split every which way and nothing greatly productive or impressive or groundbreaking gets done in Parliament because everyone is too afraid of losing what little bits of power they have.

How would you describe the state of pop culture?
Fucking train wreck. Seriously. I like to think of myself as a bit of a Pop Culture guy and it's sad the state of affairs right now. Even shittier is that it might just keep getting worse and worse. I mean, Dina Lohan has her own reality show and she's using it to promote her next daughter. Meanwhile, daughter #1 Lindsay is a total fucking mess who can't stay out of rehab and off the blow. Worse yet, Britney Spears has a number one single and a number one album. Tell me how in the world does this happen? Shouldn't someone have stood up and said, "We're not making your album until you get your shit straight?" It's not about your fifteen minutes of fame anymore. Now it's down to fifteen seconds, thanks to YouTube, Us Weekly and TMZ. People are missing the bigger picture of pop culture and what it can be. Instead, the focus is on dirt - tabloid bullshit - and that is really troubling.

Are you worried about the predicted disappearance of books and magazines and newspapers?
Not one bit. As much as technology has advanced and more types of media are available online and in different forms, nothing will ever beat the real thing. There is something about sitting in the park or a coffee shop or your living room reading a book or the newspaper that you just don't get from flipping through the virtual version. If anything, I think the Internet helps strengthen things because it is another avenue for getting your name and your work out to people. That wasn't available before. Some of those new people might just find the online version of your work, but there are still thousands of people who buy books, have magazine and newspaper subscriptions and do things the old fashioned way. That will never disappear.

What songs do you want played at your funeral?
The only one I know for sure is "Change" by Blind Melon. There is a lyric from that song that has been my quote for as long as I can remember. It's at the top of this blog actually. Other than that, I'd want something, not upbeat, but uplifting. I don't want my funeral to be a big sad bastard festival. I want to be celebrated and remembered. There would probably have to be some Kanye...

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Introducing...

Name: Spencer Kyte ... the E is for Edgar, a nod to my grandfather
Age: 29
Height: 5' 10"...not tall enough to fulfill my basketball dreams
Weight: I'll tell you when we're a little better acquainted
Eyes: Green

So yesterday, my 29th birthday, I was sitting at dinner with my girlfriend and I came to the revelation that all I want to do is write. This wasn't anything new; I've been saying the same thing for the better part of the last year, but this time I had a new plan. Time to unleash the Three-Headed Monster.

Head One - Bugs & Cranks
The Rookie of the Year of Baseball Blogs if I do say so myself.
In less than a year, this little engine that could has gone from total obscurity to being one of the top rated sports blogs on the Net according to the good people at BallHype, and what they say goes. I cover the Toronto Blue Jays and anything else Major League Baseball related that comes to mind, especially if it involves Josh Hamilton. Honestly, you need to check it out...

Head Two - Passion Magazine (Site Relaunched November 26, 2007)
Being a part of something you think is going to be big from the very beginning is an intoxicating feeling. It was like that with Bugs and the same feelings have returned with my involvement with Passion. After a brief hiatus and some restructuring, Passion is set to relaunch on Novemeber 26 and YT is going to be a part of it, with two articles and a little picture/bio combo to boot. If you're looking for Style / Life / Culture, Passion is all you need.

Head Three - You're Reading It!
This was the revelation that I had over a pint of Guinness and a Clubhouse Panini: I need another outlet. Bugs is great for baseball and Passion is a perfect bi-monthly side bet, but there has got to be more that I can do to get my name out there and do what I love to do. Then I remembered that a couple months ago when I did some pinch hitting at Our Book of Scrap (What's up Scrap?!) I set up this Blogger Account and I figured, "Why not use it?"

And so here we are.

This is going to serve as my outlet for all the randomness that flows through my mind - from sports to music to movies to politics to absolutely anything and everything else. I'll keep the baseball stuff over at Bugs, but everything else will be coming to you live and in colour - and colour is spelled with a U - right here.

Welcome to the Freak Show Boys & Girls!

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