Wednesday, July 15, 2009

The Rundown: Have You Seen Him?


Last week, The Rundown was loaded up with ladies who were once everywhere and are currently nowhere to be found. Seriously, when is the last time you saw Rachel Leigh Cook?

As promised, this week's installment switches sexes and looks at the guys who have gone AWOL. Fittingly enough, another She's All That alum is leading us off.

Top Five Male Disappearing Acts

5. Freddie Prinze Jr.
Much like the lady who played Laney, Prinze was everywhere during the She's All That / Summer Catch / Scooby-Doo days and now, ghost. His most memorable turn in the past few years probably was his guest spot as a male nanny on Friends, and that was seven years ago. Sadly, he's coming back, joining the cast of 24 for the 2010 season.

4. Cuba Gooding Jr.
Everything was going great. Good roles were coming in. Then came the Oscars and Rod Tidwell's acceptance speech. Since then you've got Rat Race, Boat Trip, so many straight-to-DVD releases they could fill an entire wall at Blockbuster. Let this be a lesson to actors everywhere: if you win an Oscar, don't act a fool or else you'll end up being Cuba's co-star in Daddy Day Camp 2.

3. Joaquin Phoenix
I know where he's gone - CRAZY! Consider this more of a "Get your ass back here and quit being all weird" than a "Whatever happened to?" type moment. Easily one of the best actors of this generation, Rivers' little brother decided earlier in the year to pack it in, grow a ridiculous beard and become the worst rapper ever, as if the world needs more shitty rappers and less great actors.

2. Everyone From N Synce Not Named Timberlake
These guys collectively are the new Andrew Ridgeley. You know - the other guy from WHAM! with George Michael. These four schleps are the modern equivalent. Let's see what they've done since JT left town:

  • Joey Fatone (or Fat One as I call him) - hosted a crappier, now canceled version of Don't Forget the Lyrics
  • JC Chasez - one decent single (Blowin' Me Up) and a role as a judge on America's Best Dance Crew
  • Lance Bass - gleaning notoriety from his sexual preference and not going into space.
  • Chris Kirkpatrick - Praying Justin wants to do a reunion tour.

Note to all groups with one super-talented member: keep them around or fade into oblivion.

1. Diddy

Whether you call him Sean Combs, Puff Daddy, P. Diddy or any of the 47 other names he's used, you might have a hard time calling him since he's seemingly disappeared. There was a point when you couldn't escape him. He was Making the Band, opening restaurants, taking over the fashion world with Sean John and producing hits left, right and center. Now I can't tell you the last time I saw Diddy on a magazine cover or on television. Where'd you go, Diddy?

1 comment:

Ashley said...

You took some of my suggestions!
yay! Well done!