The title might sound like the most ridiculous thing anyone can say, but in my life, it is 100% accurate because my life pretty much revolves around work in some way, shape or form.
For those not 100% up to speed:
I work 30-40 hours a week as a Shift Leader at Blockbuster Video. As I've said before, it's not glamorous, but I love the people I work with and the free movies are a good perk, plus the freakshow customers make for interesting blog material on a slow news day. This is the work that is deemed interference.
The work that is interfered with is, of course, my writing. At present count, there are three jobs (Bugs & Cranks, Epic Carnival and Passion Magazine), two side projects (This Blog and Nudigs, the real estate site I occasionally contribute to) and three aspirations that aren't getting the time they deserve (my book, my screenplay and a book a friend would like me to help him write).
Now I know what you're thinking: How much time can it possibly take to sit down and churn out the drivel that I throw up on this site on a daily basis? The answer, in all honesty, is not that long, at least not here. But the B&C and Epic work takes a little more time, Passion is somewhat labor intensive, although only in bi-monthly intervals and there is the simple fact that the rest of life needs to take place as well. You know, little things like eating, sleeping, spending time with Sarah that isn't her sitting on the couch looking at my back as I sit here typing feverishly.
Basically, I'm just whining. Life dictates that I need to earn money to pay the bills et al and since writing doesn't provide financial security as of yet, those 35-40 hours rockin' the Block are very much required, no matter how much I want to try to justify staying home to work on my craft.
What does all of this mean to you? Nothing probably, unless you or someone you know owns or operates a publishing company, magazine, newspaper or website that wants to pay me the equivalent of my Blockbuster earnings so that I can sit at home in my housecoat all day telling everyone I'm a writer.
Oh - you could also help boost the profile by buying up copies of Passion, checking out all my stuff on all my sites and becoming a fan on Facebook, but that's just me shamelessly self-promoting...
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Working Interferes With Working
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Things I Learned This Week
You know what? This has actually been a fairly mild mannered week all things considered. I mean, I didn't hit anymore deer, we're all moved in and work wasn't actually that bad. Still, life is always educational.
1. I Have The Ability To Change People
Contrary to the popular belief that people can only change if they want to, I present my girlfriend, Sarah, as my exhibit that I have transformative powers, if transformative is even a word. When we met, she was quiet, never swore and was financially responsible. Seventeen months later, she's only quiet when she is uncomfortable, swears with great regularity - especially at the computer - and has developed an affinity for spending money. To hell with popular beliefs... I have the power!
2. Exercise Blows
Yeah, this isn't so much a "Thing I Learned This Week" as it is an "Affirmation of Something I Already Knew," but either way, it fits. I now walk to and from work pretty much every day. It's not that far, doesn't take that long and is probably going to help me with that whole get in shape resolution of mine. But still, I hate it. I hate the cold to begin with, so knowing that I have to trudge my fat ass up hill 50% of the way each way in the bitter cold of The Rock isn't very appealing. Doesn't help that my new boots aren't worn in yet either, so I get to work and have a bloody mess of a heal every day. Stupid deer ruining our car and making me exercise!
3. New Year, Same Morons Part I
2008 hasn't decreased the amount of mouth-breathing idiots that flock to Blockbuster on a daily basis. In fact, thus far, 2008 has been a banner year for morons. Example 1: The Crotchety Old Lady who pays no attention to the fact that there is a lineup, walks up to my cash and demands to know where our Prison Section is, as if we have an entire area devoted to three crappy Steven Seagal prison movies and Blood In, Blood Out. What makes her even better is that she kept at it for twenty minutes, demanding I pick out some prison movies for her as if I have them all committed to memory before she told someone on the other end of her cell phone that I was being an asshole. Yes, I was standing right next to her when she said it. Wicked, eh?
4. New Year, Same Morons Part II
A Random Guy who came in yesterday and asked if we had a section of adult magazines. What The Fuck Dude? I could understand asking about skin flicks - and it happens with some frequency - but what part of our store being called Blockbuster Video makes you think we would possibly have a stack of spank mags tucked away in a corner of the store, maybe next to the kid's section just for shits and giggles? Seriously...
5. My Fan Base Stands at 2
Now you and I know that that isn't exactly true, because I know exactly how many people have visited this here site in the past couple weeks and it's a lot more than two, but I have this little Facebook Exercise in Narcissism set up where people can click a link and "Become a Fan of... E.Spencer Kyte, Writer" and there are currently two such people. One is Sarah, who strongly objected to the exercise and joined only because she knew I would hold a grudge against her until she did and the other is my friend AJ from Bugs & Cranks. My question to you reading this with a Facebook Account - which is pretty much everyone in the world now, no? - is what the hell are you waiting for?
6. Anonymous Commentors Piss Me Off
Since I started this little venture, no one had posted a comment anonymously, until some douchebag dropped one on the Dishonour Roll: Phil Kyte post criticizing my slagging the Old Man in - gasp - a blog post! Here's what comes to mind: it's either (a) a member of my extended family who disagrees with my slagging the Old Man in general, yet alone on my blog or (b) some fuckwad who likes to comment on what other people do from the shadows of anonymity because he/she doesn't want anyone to know who they are. Grow a sack and identify yourself Anonymous one, then we can talk.
7. I Don't Miss TV
I thought this Writer's Strike would have screwed things up for me a little, but really, I haven't missed television at all. The shows I like - aside from Grey's - have remained on the air and since I've been working a great deal and doing a ton of unpacking, writing and playing NBA Live 08, I haven't missed it all that much. That being said, I'm pumped that Grey's is back as on Thursday.
8. If This Writing Thing Doesn't Work Out, I'm Becoming a Chef
Nothing compares to the feeling I get after completing a piece and seeing it take off, either in print in Passion or getting hits and votes on the 'Net. The only thing mildly similar is how satisfying it is to whip up a delicious meal from scratch, sit down and enjoy it. Fired off a couple nice ones in the last ten days of being in the new house and should writing not pan out, becoming a chef is an option. Of course, writing is going to pan out... but I might just take a couple cooking classes on the side anyway.
9. I'm A Walking Pop Culture Quote Machine...
And very few people have any idea what the hell I'm talking about half of the time. I use lines from Friends on a daily basis and have to put them in context even for the Friends Die Hards I'm surrounded by (Sarah, Ash, Erin & Kim). When someone calls Blockbuster and refuses to speak, I break out the "Baxter? Is that you? Bark twice if you're in Milwaukee" and everyone looks at me like I'm an idiot. Admittedly, I am a bit of an idiot, but still.
10. I Don't Understand Why People Are Shocked When I Know What Movie They're Talking About
I spend 40 hours a week at Blockbuster goddamn Video and have been a movie buff for a long time before that, so why is it so shocking that I know which movie you're looking for when you tell me who is in it, what it's about and roughly when it came out? This is what I do people. It works with music and sports too. Feel free to challenge me whenever you're bored...
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Just Like Jared Leto
So I run, hide and tell myself
I'll start again with a brand new name
Just as Jared Leto's 30 Seconds to Mars said on their debut single "Capricorn," I too announced a running away from the my original name here on this site, proclaiming that I would return with a new and improved moniker.
That was a week ago and so, it's time to reveal the new name...
I BLOG BECAUSE I CAN
Catchy ain't it?
Honestly, in thinking things over for the week and flipping through the various sites that for some reason allow me to post my ramblings on a regular basis (Thanks ShowHype!) I figured changing the name at this stage would be stupid. Instead of wanting to differentiate myself from the other peons who use the name, I figured I would just annihilate them with my vicious and witty rhetoric until only one blog was left standing. If at that point it isn't me, I'll come up with something else.
"7283792367"
"6226188142"
Those two random numbers are me officially claiming this here blog on BallHype and ShowHype, two sites you should definitely check out if you like (a) sports or (b) celebrity gossip and news. See why I'm there often?
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In a totally unrelated story, we live below hillbillies! Sadly, it isn't Jed and his kin either...
Nope, we live below the hillbillies who celebrate moving into a new place by breaking down doors and getting into a domestic 36 hours after moving in. Nothing spells lovin' like having the cops show up to your new place inside 48 hours.
What makes it all better, if it could even happen, is that they like fighting at 4 AM. Nothing is nicer to wake up to than a couple of freakshow skeets who I haven't laid eyes on yet cussing at each other and slamming doors while I'm trying to get some sleep. I love being woken up to the words "Get The Fuck Out" being yelled over and over and over and over.
The capper? He, the male hillbilly, doesn't even live here. Apparently just his hillbilly woman does... he broke down the door to start the fight last night. Awesome!
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Canada won it's fourth straight World Junior Hockey Championship Gold Medal this afternoon. Just in case anyone thought of questioning who the most dominating nation on ice is, our boys delivered yet another resounding answer.
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Apparently, a number of people either (a) share my hatred of the Boston area or (b) think I have some writing talent, as my I Hate Boston piece that went up on Epic Friday is gaining some votes and links throughout the Interwebs.
It pales in comparison to the Return of Cash Considerations, but I'm pasty like that...
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Go rent The Kingdom. If you listen to one bit of movie advice from me ever, make it this... again, you'll thank me. Continue reading ...
Friday, January 4, 2008
Soundtrack of My Life
I am a little bit of loneliness a little bit of disregard
Handful of complaints but I can’t help the fact that everyone can see these
scars
I am what I want you to want what I want you to feel
But it's like no matter what I do, I can't convince you, to just believe
this is real
So I let go, watching you, turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend that I'm not
But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I got
I am a little bit insecure a little unconfident
Cause you don't understand I do what I can but sometimes I don't make sense
I am what you never wanna say but I've never had a doubt
It's like no matter what I do I can't convince you for once just to hear me out
So I let go watching you turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend that I'm not
But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I've got
When you've had a rotten day - and I had a rotten day today - coming home, clicking on this track and letting it just belt on repeat is all that I need.
Thursday, January 3, 2008
Dishonour Roll: Phil Kyte
This one is sort of long over due, but I just never wanted to tell you about it because I didn't want to be that person that just blurts out all their personal crap at the start of a relationship and makes the other person freak out. Yes, what we have here is a relationship. And yes, I got some demons just like everyone else.
Unlike previous Inductees, I know this one. At least, I used to.
I haven't spoken with my old man in over two years. In fact, we've spoken once in the last five years and that was at his mother's funeral a couple Novembers ago when I bombed into Cornwall for an afternoon to pay my respects. That's just how it is now.
Long story short, my old man spent the duration of his marriage to my mom cheating on her. There were stretches where he was a good boy and didn't stray, but for the most part, given the opportunity, he would make the wrong decision. I only learned all this in 1999 when Faye finally got tired of all the bullshit and filed for divorce.
After they split, I toughed it out and stayed in his life as best I could, coming home for visits, going golfing, staying at his place, but he just wasn't happy with his situation and moved back to his family home in Cornwall where at least he would have his brothers and sister around as support. He took up with some woman, but that didn't last long and after one final shouting match in a bar when I was home for my Uncle Jack's funeral, ties were severed.
Phil Kyte could have been so much more than he is today. He was smart, charming, witty and well-liked, but he didn't like himself and has some serious issues that he never wanted to deal with properly. Now I have no idea where he is or what he is up to. He will never meet his granddaughter Emily Grace, and he has missed out on the better part of the last five years of my life. That's part of the reason I intend to make my leap into literary stardom on the back of our story... because he could have been a real part of it had he wanted to be, but that, like everything else in life, was too hard for him.
The reason I am telling you this, and featuring him in the Dishonour Roll, was my mentioning of writing a book yesterday as one of my resolutions. The book is about him. Actually, the book is about my relationship with him and the situation as it has now become. It was originally titled "Superman is Dead" but I figured Our Lady Peace would sue me for using the name of one of their songs as the title of my book. Perhaps DC Comics would have been a little mad too...
A long time coming and probably the most fitting of all thus far.
Welcome to the Dishonour Roll Phil... wherever you are.
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