10 Things I Learned

There are some old favorites and some new morsels of information, so settle in and say hello to Albert...

1. I've Finally Started
After talking about the project for what seems like eternity, I got off my ass and started my book this week. Actually, I started the proposal and query letter, but that is more important to be honest. Aiming to have this stage completed by next weekend. Going to take time though.

2. Turns Out I'm Free 'til Friday
Good thing I work at a restaurant without any customers! Instead of continuing to be exceptionally annoyed by the constant strain of "don't worry, you're going to get shifts," only to see two shifts on my schedule, I'm looking at it as a means to finishing the above mentioned project. Thanks for the time off...

3. A New Outlet
No, I'm not still yammering on about Keyboard Kimura, although you should most certainly visit iBlog's sister site as frequently as possible. This is about MMA 4 Real, an MMA site based in North Carolina that now features this guy as a routine poster in the FanPosts section as an audition for bigger and better.

4. Getting the Name Out There
Thanks to all 121 people who have taken part in the Shameless Self-Promotion Tour to this point, joining the Facebook Fan Page and helping circulate my name through your social networks. Believe me when I say that in the near future you'll be able to say, "I knew him when..."

5. Best Commercial Ever
Nothing beats the Dos Equis "Most Interesting Man in the World" ad that is running right now. Of course, I might be biased as I am currently enjoying a Dos Equis and have liked the beer since a trip to California seven years ago. Anyway, I too want to live vicariously through myself and have an awkward moment just to know what it feels like. Stay thirsty, my friends!

6. Ghetto Vacations
We've got some serious redneck camping going on in the building across the way from us. A collection of Alberta families has invaded for the long weekend and have setup a patio table in the parking lot. They've also flooded a portion of the lot to allow their children - all 18 of them - to play in the water, instead of, I dunno, buying a $12 plastic kiddy pool at WalMart. Some kids get to go to Disneyland, some get to camp out in a parking lot. You can't make this stuff up.

7. The Blue Jays are Killing Me
Don't get me wrong - I'm happy to see the boys doing well as they earned the series sweep of the White Sox today. But man is it tough to swallow having walked away from them and proclaimed them dead back in January and see them playing so well. My man Chalk assures me that it will all come to an end soon, but right now, I just don't see it. They might have a little something going...

8. My First Mention of the Red Wings All Playoffs
I have been trying not to say anything about my boys from Detroit, but now that they're through to the Conference Finals - for the 8th time in 12 years or something like that - I'd like for everyone to acknowledge the utter dominance of the Red Wings. They may have looked shaky here and there, but in the end, the best team always wins and Detroit is clearly the best team.

9. Thoughts on Dana White
UFC President Dana White has been in the news all week after a segment about the foul-mouthed figurehead of the MMA giant aired on ESPN's E:60. While I don't always agree with the things that White says or the colorful language that he prefers, I have no problem with him as the head of the biggest organization in the sport I love. If we had a Roger Goodell or a David Stern in charge, MMA would have failed long before it got to the point they're at now. Could he clean up his language and stop the tirades at members of the media? Sure, but that is who Dana is and for better or worse, he's great for the sport.

10. I Forgot to Tell You Last Week...
But X-Men Origins: Wolverine was awesome! Just awesome. They did a great job with the relationship between Logan and Victor "Sabretooth" Creed, Deadpool was wicked and you could barely recognize Ryan Reynolds when he came out and there are sure to be more Origins flicks or spin-offs in the near future and I'll be seeing every one.

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Soundtrack of My Life

Song: Dueling Banjos

Artists: "Lonnie" and "The Inbred Hillbilly Kid"
Album: Deliverance OST (1972)

I know this one is going to make everyone wonder what in the name of all hell I'm talking about, but don't worry, I'm about to explain.

Today we drove from Midland to Ottawa via the route planned out for us by the fine folks that made the Garmin Nuvi GPS system that was directing us in the car today. Now, being a guy who has family in and around Ottawa, I've been here once or twice and know a couple ways to get here. None of them were the route that that Nuvi was sending us.

For anyone who doesn't have one of these things - save your money.

According to our GPS, the only way from Midland to Ottawa is via East Deliverance, Ontario down a set of dirt roads and rural locales that make the place where the guys from the clip above stop look like a booming metropolis. At one point we went from being on a mid-major highway that goes from Point A North of Midland through Algonquin Park to Point B Ottawa and our fabulous GPS told us to get off that road take some hillbilly highway full of potholes and pig farms only to have us get back on the original route some 45 minutes later.

Thankfully, we didn't have to stop anywhere to get gas, because I was without my banjo and I sure as shit wasn't ready to squeal like a pig...

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Just Like Jared Leto

So I run, hide and tell myself
I'll start again with a brand new name

Just as Jared Leto's 30 Seconds to Mars said on their debut single "Capricorn," I too announced a running away from the my original name here on this site, proclaiming that I would return with a new and improved moniker.

That was a week ago and so, it's time to reveal the new name...

I BLOG BECAUSE I CAN

Catchy ain't it?

Honestly, in thinking things over for the week and flipping through the various sites that for some reason allow me to post my ramblings on a regular basis (Thanks ShowHype!) I figured changing the name at this stage would be stupid. Instead of wanting to differentiate myself from the other peons who use the name, I figured I would just annihilate them with my vicious and witty rhetoric until only one blog was left standing. If at that point it isn't me, I'll come up with something else.

"7283792367"
"6226188142"


Those two random numbers are me officially claiming this here blog on BallHype and ShowHype, two sites you should definitely check out if you like (a) sports or (b) celebrity gossip and news. See why I'm there often?
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In a totally unrelated story, we live below hillbillies! Sadly, it isn't Jed and his kin either...

Nope, we live below the hillbillies who celebrate moving into a new place by breaking down doors and getting into a domestic 36 hours after moving in. Nothing spells lovin' like having the cops show up to your new place inside 48 hours.

What makes it all better, if it could even happen, is that they like fighting at 4 AM. Nothing is nicer to wake up to than a couple of freakshow skeets who I haven't laid eyes on yet cussing at each other and slamming doors while I'm trying to get some sleep. I love being woken up to the words "Get The Fuck Out" being yelled over and over and over and over.

The capper? He, the male hillbilly, doesn't even live here. Apparently just his hillbilly woman does... he broke down the door to start the fight last night. Awesome!
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Canada won it's fourth straight World Junior Hockey Championship Gold Medal this afternoon. Just in case anyone thought of questioning who the most dominating nation on ice is, our boys delivered yet another resounding answer.
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Apparently, a number of people either (a) share my hatred of the Boston area or (b) think I have some writing talent, as my I Hate Boston piece that went up on Epic Friday is gaining some votes and links throughout the Interwebs.

It pales in comparison to the Return of Cash Considerations, but I'm pasty like that...
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Go rent The Kingdom. If you listen to one bit of movie advice from me ever, make it this... again, you'll thank me.

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