Saturday, June 27, 2009

She Wouldn't Be Alone Now

I remember when this really was an accurate representation.

Now, at least 50% of that graduating class would have more than their legs dangling for all to see and it's amazing -slash - ridiculous to me.

Let me clarify my use of the word amazing. I don't mean amazing in a "hell yeah, look at all these sluts! I love sluts!" kind of way. More of a "where in the fuck did all these sluts come from?" fashion.

When I was growing up, my elementary school had exactly one slut. Her name was Tamara. Back then, the definition of slut meant she let you touch her boobs and slide your hand inside her Levis if you were lucky. (Note: I didn't even try to be lucky back then...)

High school wasn't much different either and not just because I was sitting far, far away from the cool kids. There were ninja sluts - girls who only operated as sluts in the shadows, appearing "normal" on the outside - but the number of overt skanks was far less numerous than it is today.

You can't drive down the street without potentially running over at least four or five skanks every per block!

Seriously... where did they all come from?

Did some law get passed that made it illegal to not have your tits hanging out at every possible moment and the only pants females under the age of 25 are allowed to wear are either (1) black stretchy pants or (B) jeans that are just a little small so your underwear and/or ass hangs out for all to see every single time you bend down to get something?

Who's going to buy the cow when they get the milk for free 397 times a day?

And for all those people who are now going to bitch about my making sweeping generalizations and dressing a certain way doesn't mean anything, you like to look nice, blah blah blah blah blah, I say this:

If it looks like a slut, walks like a slut and is surrounded by several other slut-like creatures, chances are she's going to be sucking dick way earlier than her parents would like too...

While it certainly doesn't just stay in the land of the ladies - there are males sluts too; I was once one of them - there are a couple key distinctions that need to be made for all the "this is such a double standard" believers out there:

1) Yes, it's a double standard. Sluts versus Studs. Been that way for a while. Deal with it already.

2) D'you know what happens to guys walking around showing off more skin than is covered up? They get mercilessly ridiculed by every other man on the face of the Earth until they put on more clothes. Why do you think guys who wear Speedos tend to hang out with other guys who wear Speedos? They're the only idiots who think they look good...

3) Conversely, a girl walking around with more flesh than fabric is not only the target of catty comments from skanks and non-skanks alike, but she also draws the attention of Pervy Perverson, the 46-year-old guy who can't look her in the eyes when she's interacting with him at work. Or worse...

And don't even get me started on the Internet. Everyone with a webcam and a heartbeat has some skanked up picture(s) of themselves and the number of "adult dating services" or "chatrooms" combine to outnumber the remaining websites in existence.

Someone needs to do a study on this and figure out where all these sluts came from.

Or at least get them to cover up every once in a while.


Tom said...

A topic you could discuss are Boobs, an how awesome they are! Just saying the word Boobs is fun...think about it.

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Anonymous said...

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