Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Dishonour Roll: Jimmy Fallon

This one has been a long time coming.

I can't remember ever liking Jimmy Fallon. Not ever. He's just not funny to me.

He wasn't funny for the years that he couldn't make it through a skit on SNL without cracking up and the only thing funny about his movie career is how horrible movies like Taxi actually were. Not to mention that he absolutely bastardized Nick Hornby's outstanding Fever Pitch by making it about the Boston Goddamn Red Sox!

But none of that ever landed him on The Dishonour Roll because I could simply choose to ignore the moron and live my life as if he never existed.

Then I heard a piece of news today that made me want to kill the bastard.

Next year, Fallon takes over for Conan O'Brien when the Ginger takes over for Leno. Still with me?

Now Fallon getting his own late night gig is old news, so that isn't the cause of the displeasure either.

Reports that The Roots have stopped touring to become JIMMY FALLON'S HOUSE BAND is another story.

This fucker is going to rip The Legendary Roots Crew away from the world so ?uestlove can serve as his own Max Weinberg? The greatest hip hop band on the face of Planet Earth is going to play side stage to Jimmy Fucking Fallon?

Mayhaps I should be directing my anger towards The Roots, but let's be honest, if you threw enough money at me, I would do just about anything, so I can't totally blame them.

What lands Fallon on the list is that you know NBC is giving him their full support which means even if (when) he sucks balls, he's still going to be around because someone has to have the late night slot after Leno.

In turn, that means that if these reports are right, The Roots will be tied up being Jimmy Fallon's House Band for the foreseeable future, instead of touring the countryside delivering bad-ass shows to legions of fans.

So not only will the number of retards on late night TV increase, but I'll also lose one of my favourite bands of all-time?

I hate you Jimmy Fallon.

1 comment:

Newt said...

I would never see the Roots doing something like this. It just doesnt seem to be in their nature to become a "house band" somewhere. It feels wrong.