Dina Lohan: Still The Best Mom Ever

Inaugural Dishonour Roll inductee Dina Lohan is back in the headlines this week following the debut of her new show on E! Living Lohan.

The premise? Follow Dina et al around as she finds new ways to exploit her children and blame everyone else for the disaster that is her eldest child.

Back in November when Dina was dishonoured for her parenting skills, it was, for the most part, due to the antics of Lindsay and Dina's lack of interest in curbing her wild child daughter's self-destructive behaviour.

Today, it's a whole new barrel of monkeys.

You know what's an awesome parenting technique? Looking at porn that claims to be one of your daughters when the other walks in and asks you, "Is that Lindsay?"

This is precisely what happened in Episode 1 of Living Lohan.

Can you imagine? Ali is what, 15?

My parents would have slapped me silly had they found the porno mags I had tucked away in various locations throughout the house at age 15...

This woman is looking at porn claiming to be her daughter, not reacting in any way when her 15 year old walks in and asks about it and then calls Lindsay to confirm whether it is her or not.
How does that conversation go?

"Lindsay, it's Mommy. Listen baby, there are some pictures that look like you on the Internet. Did you suck any dick on camera recently?"

"Gee Mom, I dunno. It's been a while, I think. I haven't sucked any dick in like, three weeks. I'm a lesbian now, remember?"

The capper of it all is the next scene, where Dina insists that the paparazzi and the media attention have got to stop and threatens legal action to some poor schlep on the other end of a phone.

You know what would help Dina?

If you didn't prostitute your kids on television like they were giant cash cows.

But you couldn't do that now, could you? Then how would you get all the fame and attention you crave?

Peep the episode here.

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