My Thumb is All Jacked Up

Though that isn't actually me in the picture, it very much could be within the next day or two.

My thumb is severely jacked up thanks to a shitty knife and an unripe avocado.

I know there are going to be some people out there who advocate removing an avocado seed by scooping it out with a spoon, and while that is certainly a viable method, it's not how I roll. I used the old "heel of the knife" routine.

Unfortunately, when you mix a rock solid stone with a crappy knife that surprising has a completely blunt and useless heel, shit like this happens.

Impact of dull knife onto cement stone sends knife sliding off stone and into Spencer's thumb. Massive amounts of blood follow.

I spent all day night yesterday with a maxi-pad wrapped around my thumb. What? Them fuckers are super absorbent... besides, I'm married to the only nurse who doesn't have a ridiculously overstocked first aid kit in the house.

You gotta use what you got, people.

Anyway, I took a look at the gash on my thumb - the same thumb that already has a great scar down the center of where my fingerprint would be from an arena accident when I was six - and it looks way worse than it feels.

I still don't know if that's a good thing or not; while the lack of intense pain is awesome, the amount of skin dying around the wound and disturbingly tender fatty tissue sticking out from it don't make me optimistic about having this thing dealt with through home remedies, even with the new supplies that mysteriously landed on my bathroom counter.

Nope, chances are this is going to be a trip to the doctor tomorrow afternoon, which is not only a great way to spend a Friday, but also a wonderful way for Tim & Michelle (brother-in-law and his GF) to kickoff their vacation.

"Hey guys! How was the flight? So I jacked up my thumb a couple nights back and now I need to go to the doctors. Don't worry, they have good magazines."

Sounds like the start of something awesome to me...

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10 Things I Learned This Week

1. The Kyte Family is One Person Bigger
I'd like to start off by welcoming Brooke Smith to the Freak Show on a full-time basis. On Tuesday afternoon in Vegas Baby Vegas, Brooke and my brother Peter were married. Congratulations to both my brother and my new sister-in-law!

2. It's Official
Sarah is officially a nurse! She passed her nurses exam (as if there was any doubt) and is now a part of the workforce 100%. Congratulations Baby... enjoy the next 40 years of work!

3. As A Present to Herself...
Sarah purchased an Xbox 360 with Guitar Hero World Tour and two guitars last night. That's the best present that I've ever received and it wasn't even for me! After five hours of button mashing madness last night, we finally shut things down around 1:00 AM due to exhaustion and freshly forming callouses.

4. Interestingly Enough...
I'm off Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday this week. I won't, however, be shredding on my guitar all day long. I'm starting the book Tuesday morning, in hopes of getting a good chunk of work done so that I can send a portion out for feedback and to gauge interest. After a couple months of making notes and scribbling in the idea book, it's time to get down to work.

5. Brock Lesnar: UFC Heavyweight Champion
Not only do I love Brock's win from a fan standpoint of watching the future of MMA at his beginning, but I love this win from a writing standpoint too. I've spent a lot of time writing about MMA lately and predicting this fight correctly - as I did in two pieces at The Love of Sports this week - shows that I know what I'm talking about. In fact, I got the four biggest fights on the card perfect including my man Demian Maia submitting Nate Quarrey.

6. Getting Closer to the Goal
An email this week from The Powers That Be at The Love of Sports has potentially brought me one step closer to my goal of being able to sustain myself solely through my writing. Basically, the more I write, the better chance I have at getting what I want is what it boils down to, so as much as I'd like to practice up on the video game axe during my downtime, time writing today is going to mean time staying home in the future, so Guitar Hero will have to wait.

7. Polygamy is Effin' Crazy!
Sarah is watching the TLC Forbidden Love special on polygamy and just overhearing some of the crap these chicks are saying is nuts. You have to be some kind of whack job to be okay with your husband having seven other wives. Could you imagine? "Hey Honey, I'ma marry this one too and we'll all live together. Tonight I'ma sleep with you, but tomorrow, I'ma sleep with her. Kay?" How does that make you feel loved?

8. I Should Have Kept Playing Baseball
Why did everyone just let me walk away at age 12 like I did? How come no one told me to keep playing, get better and make it to the Majors? The money these teams are throwing around free agents, even a no stick, no mitt, no wheels guy like me would be able to pull in a couple million a season...

9. This Is Where I'm Meant to Be
Now that we've been out here for a month, it's fair to say that the infatuation stage of things is over. That's why I know this area - or at least BC in general - is where I'm meant to be. Everything about the area still makes me smile - the snow-covered mountain peaks in the distance, the friendliness of everyone in town, the fresh air and peaceful surroundings. I never thought I would be able to live away from "The City," but it's really not hard at all. In fact, it's better.

10. One Month, Three Smokes
Not bad for a guy who has been smoking since he was sixteen if you ask me...

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